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你的雅思作文句子有效吗 雅思作文修改一例:现代技术对人的影响

更新:2023年03月22日 16:21 雅思无忧

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你的雅思作文句子有效吗 雅思作文修改一例:现代技术对人的影响

你的雅思作文句子有效吗?英文简洁之美

句子结构是雅思写作评分标准“语法的多样性与准确度”中一项十分重要的考量因素,但这并不意味着要求考生具备写长难句的能力。在追求输出像雅思阅读一样精到的语言之前,我们首先要确保的应当是写出来的句子是正确的。有效的句子甚而段落通常应当同时满足以下五个要素:一致、连贯、简洁、强调、多样。

1. 一致:如句内的逻辑关系,注意检查是否存在简单推论、逻辑残缺、逻辑悖论、依赖偏见等。

Born in a *all town in South Chinain the early 1950s, he grew up to be a famous musician.

→ He was born in a *all town in South China in the early 1950s. In his childhood he liked to sing songs. Later he entered a conservatory. In the 1970s he became a famous musician.

2. 连贯:这个问题在平行结构、共用主语、使用指代的情况下尤其需要注意。

We thought she was charming, intelligent, and a very capable young woman.

→ We thought she was charming, intelligent, and very capable.

Or: We thought she was a charming, intelligent, and very capable young woman.

He was knocked down by a bicycle, but it was not serious.

→ He was knocked down by a bicycle, but was not badly injured.

Looking out of the window, the grassland stretches as far as the eye can reach.

→ Looking out of the window, we can see the grassland stretching as far as the eye can reach.

Or: Outside the window, the grassland stretches as far as the eye can reach.

He gave a reason for not attending the meeting, which nobody believed.

→ He gave a reason, which nobody believed, for not attending the meeting.

Or: He gave a reason for not attending the meeting, a reason which nobody believed.

3. 简洁:英美文化推崇坦率和直接,通常不需要体现咱儒家文化的含蓄和委婉。

It was *all in size and blue in colour.

→ It was *all and blue.

He usually likes to drink all kinds of wines that are produced in France.

→ He prefers French wines.

4. 强调:正如每篇文章都要有中心思想(main idea),每个段落都要有主题句(topic sentence)一般,每个句子都要围绕一个中心观点清晰地呈现出作者想要表现的重点。

He is modest and hardworking and is a good student.

→ He is a good student, modest and hardworking.

There is a big tree, which is said to be 300 years old, in the temple.

→ In the temple there is a big tree, which is said to be 300 years old.

At the sight of the disorderly crowd, he was aware that something bad would be possible.

→ The moment he saw the disorderly crowd, he knew that something bad would happen.

5. 多样:中文重重复,英文重替代,中英差异使然。

雅思作文修改一例:现代技术对人的影响

  Modern technology has had a great influence on people’s entertainment choices, making them less creative. Co you agree or disagree with this opinion?


  Modern technology has had a great influence on people’s entertainment choices, making them less creative. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

  Bearing in mind the likely effects of the modern technology on entertainments on today’s users are important, because it is an issue that is discussed daily nowadays by people in both the private and public sectors. However, does the modern technology benefits all aspects of human society? Some people may answer to the contrary. As far as I can see, current technology is undermining modern people’s creative ability by providing individuals sorted ways of relaxation.


  The likely effects of modern technology on entertainment for people today are important, because it is an issue that is discussed daily in both the private and public sectors. However, does modern technology benefit all aspects of human society? Some people may answer in the negative. As far as I can see, modern technology undermines people’s creative ability by providing individuals pre-digested forms of relaxation.


  To begin with , it has been known from the latest resources that modern people prefer to enjoy high-tech ways of recreation. More and more people from all works feel so pressuarable that they turn to modern technology which is supposed to be there providing convenient, time-saving and fresh entertainment while fewer and fewer individuals choose to play jigsaws or make some exquisite handicrafts which is the very things expand their imaginary world and make them more creative in their spare time.


  To begin with , it has been known from recent sources that modern people enjoy high-tech ways of recreation. More and more people from all walks of life feel so pressured that they turn to modern technology to provide convenient, time-saving and fresh entertainment; while fewer and fewer individuals choose to play jigsaws or make some exquisite handicrafts, the kinds of things that expand their imaginations and make them more creative in their spare time.

  Furthermore, modern people are more likely to count on current technology whether in physiological or psychological. What is meant by this is that plenty of people fully enjoy the entertaining products such as, TV, MP3 or internet games high-tech brings to them that they spend lots of time on them without doing anything else. Couch-potato syndrome is one such example. The more people rely on those modern entertaining items, the more possible that people form a negative habitual opinion that these high-tech can do everything for them, and the less likely people will be initiative and creative in their life.


  Furthermore, modern people are more likely to rely on modern technology whether for physiological or psychological reasons. What is meant by this is that many people fully enjoy the entertainment devices, such as TV, MP3 or internet games, that high technology brings to them, so that they spend lots of time on them to the detriment of everything else. The couch-potato syndrome is a result. The more that people rely on those modern entertainment devices, the more they form a negative habits, relying on all that these high-tech devices can do thing for them, and the less likely like they are to show initiative and be creative in their lives.

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