雅思作文点评：老龄化快速增长的优缺点 如何用复合句写出漂亮的雅思作文

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核，综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力，实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说，也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了雅思作文点评：老龄化快速增长的优缺点 如何用复合句写出漂亮的雅思作文，希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题，敬请关注。

雅思作文点评：老龄化快速增长的优缺点

In many countries, the number of elderly people is increasing fast. To what extent do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?

Nowadays, owning to the improvement of living condition(这里习惯用复数), people can live much longer than before, which gives rise to the fast increasing number of elderly people. Some hold that this situation will result in a series of problems, such as social burden, population expansion and so on. While others insist that it agrees the development of modern society and brings many advantages. For my part, I take the latter side with(用for) the following reasons: (74words)

点评：开头稍微写的有点长，不过内容写的还不错。属于通过分析两种不同观点，最后阐述自己观点的写法。(此种写法在雅思大作文的第一段比较常见)

美中不足的是倒数第二句的错误比较明显!while是个连词，应该连接句子与句子，所以这里前面不应该是句号。后面agree是不及物动词，不能直接加宾语。

Firstly, elder people(一会儿elderly people,一会儿又elder people，这不是自相矛盾么!!!) are the fortune of our society. They have enough experiences and capabilities which are badly lacked and needed for our youth when dealing with all sorts of problems, they can still do well in their jobs. Especially(前面应该用逗号，然后这里小写) in some professions, such as teacher, doctor, scientist and so on, sometimes (前面应该用句号，然后这里大写)age means the authority and ability. When you see a doctor, do you prefer an elderly doctor with grey hair or a youth without mustache? (77words)

Secondly, elder people(同上) are the happiness of our society. Increasing number of elderly people is also the embodiment of our improving living quality, which shows our society run(应该第三人称单数)to the right and healthy direction, we(前面句号，这里大写) have more chance and time to serve our elderly people, and it’s the happiest time of all our life to accompany with(accompany是及物动词) our parents, grandparents and great grandparents. (63words)

Finally, elderly people are the lubricant of our society. They have good temper and enough patients(应该是patience吧) to do anything, they can help us to intercede(它是不及物动词，而且主要用人作宾语) social disputes, and they make our society much more harmonious which(前面最好有个逗号)makes for the construction of harmonious society.(43words)

正文段综合点评：此篇是典型的5段式作文的写作，正文段构思出三个分论点来证明自己的观点，的确在构思上花了不少心思。但是，这里我想提的是，还是两方面都分析一下会比较好一点。特别这篇文章是问优点多还是缺点多，那么最好是缺点讲一个，然后优点再讲两个。外国人喜欢这样的辩证分析。

其次，总的来说，作者的语言还是挺流畅的。但是似乎标点有问题，该用句号的时候用逗号，改用逗号的时候用句号，这个也要扣分的!

From mentioned above, the advantages of increasing number of elderly people are obvious more than it disadvantages(典型的Chinese English.应该说there are obviously more advantages than disadvantages.). Elderly people are not the burden of our society but the source of fortune, happiness and harmony of our society.(37words)

全文总评：

尽管总的来说语言水平还是很不错的，内容也写得很充实，但缺点是语言方面还是不够细腻。此文7分。

如何用复合句写出漂亮的雅思作文

　　复合句的种类

　　英语的复合句一般分为三大类型：名词性从句、形容词性从句和副词性从句。

　　(一)名词性从句

　　在整个复合句中起名词作用，充当主语、宾语、表语和同位语等的各种从句，统称为名词性从句。名词性从句主要有以下几种：

　　1. that引导的从句e.g. It is reported that one third of Guangzhou citizens plan to buy a private car. (据报道，三分之一的广州市民打算购*私家车。)

　　2. whether/if引导的从句e.g. Whether motorcycles should be banned in Guangzhou has become an issue of controversy.(广州是否禁摩托车成了有争议的话题。)

　　3. how/why/when/where引导的从句e.g. This essay aims to explore why so many white collar workers suffer from insomnia. (本文将探讨为什么这么多白领失眠的原因。)

　　4. who/whom/whose/what/which引导的从句e.g. Who should be responsible for the environmental degradation is still unknown.(谁对环境恶化负责还不清楚。)

　　(二)形容词性从句

　　具有形容词功能，在复合句中做定语的从句被称之为形容词性从句或定语从句。被修饰的名词、词组或代词被称为先行词。形容词性从句分为两种类型：

　　(1)由关系代词who, whom, whose, that, which, as引导的从句。例如: People who are strongly against human cloning claim that it is immoral and unethical. (强烈反对克隆人的人们认为这样做不道德和不合伦理)

　　(2)由关系副词when, where, why引导的从句。例如: I would like to *yze the reasons why a growing number of teenagers are addicted to gambling.(我将分析为什么越来越多的青少年沉迷于赌博的原因。)

　　(三)副词性从句

　　副词性从句也称为状语从句，主要用来修饰主句或者主句的谓语。大致分为九大类，分别表示时间、地点、原因、目的、结果、条件、让步、比较和方式。

　　(1)时间状语从句e.g. When everyone is fully aware of the severity of fresh water scarcity and takes effective measures, I am convinced that we will tackle this problem constructively.(当每个人充分意识到淡水短缺的严重性，并采取有效措施，我相信我们一定能妥善解决好这个问题。)

　　(2)地点状语从句e.g. Where there is *oke, there is fire.(无风不起浪)(3)原因状语从句e.g. Pets should be forbidden because they may spread diseases and damage the cityscape.(应该禁止饲养宠物，因为它们可能会传播疾病和有损市容。)

　　(4)目的状语从句e.g. Old people should be encouraged to live in a nursing house so that they can enjoy professional care and first-rate facilities. (应当鼓励老人到敬老院居住，这样他们可以享受到专业的照料和一流的设施。)

　　(5)结果状语从句e.g. Some government officials fail to recognize the potential hazards of improper waste disposal, so that the environment in some cities is deteriorating.(一些*官员未能认识到垃圾处理不当带来的潜在危害，因此一些城市的环境不断恶化。)

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