如何避免写出“官腔”范儿的雅思作文 雅思作文7分并非可望而不可及

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核，综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力，实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说，也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了如何避免写出“官腔”范儿的雅思作文 雅思作文7分并非可望而不可及，希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题，敬请关注。

如何避免写出“官腔”范儿的雅思作文

　　雅思大作文考的是议论文，即考查考生是否能够在相对较短的时间内搜集论据，具体地论证自己的观点。但受国内教育体制的影响，中国考生往往缺乏对这些社会话题的深刻思考和讨论，造成思考模式的僵化与狭隘，写的太“官腔。

　　雅思大作文考的是议论文，即考查考生是否能够在相对较短的时间内搜集论据，具体地论证自己的观点。但受国内教育体制的影响，中国考生往往缺乏对这些社会话题的深刻思考和讨论，造成思考模式的僵化与狭隘，因而论证非常空洞、缺乏说服力，写的太“官腔。

　　那么，应该如何对大作文进行有力的论证呢?最常用的方式就是解释和例证，几乎在每一篇雅思大作文中，都可以看见这两种论证方法的身影。

　　下面关于“work at home or study at home”的一段例证：

　　IBM, one of the business giants, has saved nearly 70 million US dollars in its northeastern region by promoting telecommuting, which has been a driving force to other enterprises to convert their normal working staff into telecommuters. Companies in Japan are one of them and plan to launch the scheme in 2009, which, in turn, spiritually wins more supports from the existing employees, and attracts new hires. 这段话中的2个例子(商业巨头IBM和日本的企业计划)都较好地完成了“若员工选择在家上班，会对公司带来积极的作用”这一证明。

　　此外，提醒考生们需要注意的是，雅思大作文明确指出“give reasons or examples from your own experience”， 这里的“your own experience”和“your personal experience”是完全不同的概念。前者是指通过个人的学习和总结而获得的经验，后者是指个人经历或周围某个个体的故事。如谈到“working hard produces better results”， “your own experience”的例子一定是“some 3-year-high school students usually stay up late to review lessons and prepare for next day classes”， 而“your personal experience”的例子则应该是“my roommate, Tony has always been working hard on studies and staying up late every night”， 不难看出两者的区别。故雅思大作文是不能使用个人案例的论据的，这一点与新托福的写作也是不同的。

　　另外，数据论证也是一个重要的方法，同时也是国外文章中非常常见的。使用这种方式，需要注意两点：数据和数据的来源。数据的真实性不重要，但至少要看上去是“真实的”。如：A survey by the latest Ministry of Labour’s opinion poll shows that more companies would like to open their doors to disabled people, as long as they can access to modern technology, and the rate has been increasing every year by 5% since 2003.

　　使用数据论证，提醒考生们不要刻意将数据夸张，这样反而会降低数据的真实可靠性。常见的句型有“a survey by….shows that / a research by….finds out that / a study by….suggests that / Statistics by….conclude that…”省略号的部分是需要根据文章的内容来填写的数据来源出处或机构。常用的机构包括：国外大学、学院、报纸、杂志、电视台、之声、网站、研究机构、民意调查等。我们按顺序给大家做一个示范：the University of Sussex, Business College of several European countries, the USATODAY, state media CNN, BBC Talking Point, , American Institute for Research, Harris Interactive Poll等，考生可按照自己的情况，来准备几个备选方案以供使用。

雅思作文7分并非可望而不可及

现在的年轻人总是会发出“理想很丰满，现实很骨感”这样的感叹，来表达对现实生活的无奈。而在雅思写作考试中，考生们又何尝不会经历这种无奈呢?写作7分是许多考生梦寐以求的分数，但即使是一些外籍教师所撰写的范文，在考官笔下也不过是7-8分!对于国内大多数雅思考生而言，7分似乎是可望而不可及的。那么，究竟怎样的文章，才能得到考官的青睐，最终幸运的得到7分的分数呢?

一.Task response

1. 具体要求

Task response表示任务的完成。在官方给出的评分标准中，7分有这样的要求：

1. Address all parts of the task,

2. Present a clear position throughout the response,

3. Present, extend and support main ideas, but there may be a tendency to over-generalize and/or supporting ideas may lack focus。

① 回答了题目要求的所有问题。②整篇文章观点鲜明。③详细的解释和论证了观点。

2. 范例评析

▲ 剑桥雅思全真试题7 Test2 Task2

Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should be taken into account when deciding the punishment。

Discuss both views and give your own opinion。

1. 考生需要对题目中的两个相反的观点进行分析，不能只分析自己倾向的观点。即：固定不变的定罪制度有何作用;依据犯罪动机和环境灵活的定罪制度有何作用。

2. 考生需要非常清楚的表明自己的观点，即回答应当如何对罪犯的犯罪行为定罪。

3. 考生对于题目中两个相反观点的分析需要摆出充足的论据，提出自己的理由并通过例子来证明。

7.5分考生范文选段：对固定不变的定罪制度的分析

On the one hand, fixed punishment will have a deterring effect on society. ‖Individuals knowing that they will be subject to a certain punishment if they are convicted with a given crime will reconsider committing this act in the first place. ‖This deterring effect also leads to social stability and security, through minimizing the number of crimes committed. ‖If people knew they would be able to convince the court or the jury of reason for having committed the crime they are accused of, penal decisions would be largely arbitrary. This would result into criminals getting away with their crimes and into a high level of injustice caused by the subjective approach of different courts。

1. 观点：固定的惩罚制度对社会有威慑力。(fixed punishment will have a deterring effect on society。)

2. 理由：考虑犯罪成本(reconsider committing crimes in the first place)

3. 扩展结果：有利于社会稳定(lead to social stability and security through minimizing the number of crimes committed。)

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