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检查雅思作文的10个要点 雅思作文修改:网络代替学校

更新:2023年04月07日 07:54 雅思无忧

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核,综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力,实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说,也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了检查雅思作文的10个要点 雅思作文修改:网络代替学校,希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题,敬请关注。
检查雅思作文的10个要点 雅思作文修改:网络代替学校

检查雅思作文的10个要点

  作文写好了后,你检查了吗?

  只要坚持注意以下几点,相信你的写作会有意想不到的收获。

  1.是否使用了正确的语法结构,比方说,动词时态一致、主谓一致、用词准确、词性(尤其是名词、动词、形容词)、名词单复数、冠词错误和介词错误。

  2.句式是否有变化 (如各种从句的使用、分词结构等 )

  3.使用了一定的词汇量 ( 如用同义词或词组来避免过多的重复)

  4.标点、拼写没有错误。

  5.在每段的主题句中都表明了这个段落的中心思想,所有扩展句都紧扣主题。

  6.使用了过渡性词语,因而句子之间和段落之间都有逻辑性和条理性。

  7.每一段话都得到充分的展开。

  8.提供了足够的细节、例子或论据。

  9.明确的观点。

  10.每一段话都紧扣文章的主题。

  1、3、4、6为考试时检查的重点,最先检查首段,和每段的首末句。

雅思作文修改:网络代替学校

很多同学发来四段式的作文给我,但是真正能写好四段式的没有几个,下面这篇的错误比较典型,给大家参考。

题目如下:schools are no longer necessary, because children can get so much information available through Internet, and they can study just as well at home.What extent do you agree or disagree?

Scientific developments have brought us many benefits, among which the internet must be the most spectacular one. In the near future, it might take the place of schools so that it is convenient for children to obtain knowledge.

我很高兴地看到你可以把上课时讲的很多句子和单词应用在这篇四段式文章中,但是我划横线的句子表现出了你一定的倾向性,你可以把这句改为(there has long been a discussion about the opinion that whether the internet could take the place of schools.)这样可以做到客观的引入话题,而不表明观点。

With time going by, Internet has become an encyclopedia in some degree. It seems that there are an increasing number of children are fund of getting information from the Internet. Some of them are in a great need of gaining information while others just surf it as a hobby. As is known to all that encyclopedia is large enough to satisfy those little children and of course the knowledge in textbooks is included. In that case, there is no need to employ teachers to teach children. As a result children can study just as well at home and get a good grade.

However, there are certainly demerits in studying at home with the Internet. People who make the webpages can make mistakes and some knowledge is completely wrong. As a child, it is not an easy job to distinguish the information. Unlike at home, children are able to obtain knowledge in a systematic way. Besides, children who study at home are more withdrawn than those who study at schools. What is more, children don’t require teachers and that means people who now are teachers will lose their jobs. It may cause the dissipation of human resources and their families are in great trouble of making a living.

上面一段有两个问题:

1.负面的问题我觉得分析的不够,错误应该只是一个小的方面,更重要的应该是:没有人引导,孩子的学习效率会比较低下。

2.我读了划横线的句子后,感觉你的观点应该是支持网络替代学校,因为你用了,certainly这个让步词,但是你在下面一段却表明了跟我的猜测相反的观点,前后不一致,这个是致命的错误。

My view is that schools are still necessary in the future. That is the best way for children to not only get their knowledge in a systematic way but also develop their interpersonal skills. Internet is, in the long run , just a tool to widen their horizons.

如果我打分的话,Band 5

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