雅思作文修改：传统文化在流失 看名师如何用“小词”写雅思作文

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核，综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力，实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说，也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了雅思作文修改：传统文化在流失 看名师如何用“小词”写雅思作文，希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题，敬请关注。

雅思作文修改：传统文化在流失

　　对于雅思写作而言，写完了修改的过程才是雅思写作中重要的过程，为此小编特收集整理关于传统文化在流失的雅思作文修改，分享给大家，希望对大家有所帮助，文中观点仅供参考。
　　题目：As the development of modern science and technologh,some aspects of traditional culture are being lost, so some people think that the traditional culture and technologh will be replaced by the modern science and technology such as computer or internet, what is your opinion?
　　原文：
　　It has been widely noted that some aspects of tradional cuture are being lost along with the development of modern science. As far as I concerned, the traditional culture and technologh will be replaced by the modern one for several reasons as follows,
　　My first reason is that the traditional culture is hindering the development of new science which can improve people's life. Traditional technology always combines with low efficiency. Suppose if the scientists are still using cars to go abroad and attand meetings, the cloning technique will be found many years later, and consequently, a lot of patient have died.
　　My second reason is based on the high fees used to protect the traditional culture. Government provide a huge amount of money to rebuild or decorate the old buildings just because they were built by our ancestors, never thinking of their uselessness for accomodation. If the money used to protect these buildings is delivered to the poor, a lot of them will solve the accomodation problem.
　　My third reason is that people prefer the modern science and technology with the increasingly improved education system. Twenty-first century has seen a great deal of development in the proportion of people who have taken the high education. They are more willing to use the modern science. For instance, college student always collect their thesis materials by surfing the Internet instead of borrowing books from the libraries.
　　All in all, although traditional culture is a heritage from the ancient, it couldn't keep pace with the development of society. The traditional culture and technology have no place in the future and will be eliminated in the end.
　　I want to ask what aspects I should improve if I want to get 6.5 in writing?
　　修改：
　　It is widely noted that some aspects of traditional culture
　　has been lost along with the development of modern science. As far as I concerned, the traditional culture and technology will be replaced in this modern erafor several reasons.
　　My first reason is that the traditional culture is hindering the development of new science which can improve people's life. Traditional technologies are always considered to be low efficiency. Suppose if the scientists are still using cars to go abroad and attand meetings, the cloning technique will be found many years later, and consequently, a lot of patient have died.
　　(this doesn’t make any sense, going abroad by car is nonsense, and it has no relationship to cloning technique, patient’s death is not necessarily as of the result from the delay of commuter.) Recommendation: revise and think of a more persuasive reasoning and logics.
　　My second reason is based on the high cost used to protect the traditional culture. Government provides a huge amount of money to rebuild or decorate the old buildings just because they were built by our ancestors; they seldom
　　considered their usefulness for accommodation. If the money used to protect these buildings was instead delivered to the poor, a lot of them will solve the accommodation problem.
　　My third reason is that people prefer modern science and technology with the increasingly improved education system. Twenty-first centuries has been seenhigh the proportion of people who have taken the higher education. They are more willing to use the modern science. For instance, college student always collect their thesis materials by surfing the Internet instead of borrowing books from the libraries.
　　All in all, although traditional culture is a heritage from the ancient, it couldn't keep pace with the development of society. The traditional culture and technology have no place in the future and will be eliminated in the end.
　　以上就是传统文化在流失的雅思作文修改的全部介绍，希望对大家有所帮助，最后祝大家都能考出好成绩。

看名师如何用“小词”写雅思作文

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那些人背诵单词和看语法书已经有十年多了，这样的十年在英文学习上证明是徒劳无益的，他们写出来的句子毫无法则，单词也不会用。无法表达自己。既然这样，结果证明是失败的，那么他们为什么还要愚钝地坚持自己错误的做法呢？我不是批评，我是告诉大家，要不断检验自己的方法和效果，并且不断改进。下面是我课堂写的一段关于高中毕业生是否在上大学之前要工作或者旅游一段时间。注意，我用的单词全部是高中1500核心单词之内。这并不是说高中英文教育还有什么价值，而是说大部分人是经历过高中学习的，已经具备了一般高中词汇的认知能力,全文257单词, The established idea about high school students is that they should enter universities or colleges after they have finished high school study. But in these years the number of students who go to travel or work increases at a fast speed, attracting attention to study. Either to travel or to do a job, part time or full time, helps students to grow in a happy and healthy way. To work usually means to earn a sum of money which a student uses to buy whatever delights him or her. Besides, the sum of money has deep sense to a student because he or she feels that he has grown up enough to help parents release pressure. My own experience in a factory in the summer holiday in 1996 severs as a good example. I earned totally ￥92.75 RMB that summer, almost half of my total year tuition. To travel is also positive to students who have been kept in classrooms for long. When one travels, he or she learns more in a different way unavailable in classroom. My English professor once said that a person learns more in a hundred-mile travel than reading ten thousand books. In fact, a travel is a complex process, in which one learns to make stranger acquaintance, acquaintance friends, and friends brothers and sisters. In traveling, not only can the traveler learn more about the geography, biology, and culture but also the deep means of life. Clearly, to travel and to work both are helpful to the high school leavers. 点击查看原文》》》

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