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雅思作文修改:传统文化在流失 牛人总结的雅思作文评分标准

更新:2023年04月24日 17:09 雅思无忧

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核,综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力,实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说,也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了雅思作文修改:传统文化在流失 牛人总结的雅思作文评分标准,希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题,敬请关注。
雅思作文修改:传统文化在流失 牛人总结的雅思作文评分标准

雅思作文修改:传统文化在流失


  对于雅思写作而言,写完了修改的过程才是雅思写作中重要的过程,为此小编特收集整理关于传统文化在流失的雅思作文修改,分享给大家,希望对大家有所帮助,文中观点仅供参考。
  题目:As the development of modern science and technologh,some aspects of traditional culture are being lost, so some people think that the traditional culture and technologh will be replaced by the modern science and technology such as computer or internet, what is your opinion?
  原文:
  It has been widely noted that some aspects of tradional cuture are being lost along with the development of modern science. As far as I concerned, the traditional culture and technologh will be replaced by the modern one for several reasons as follows,
  My first reason is that the traditional culture is hindering the development of new science which can improve people's life. Traditional technology always combines with low efficiency. Suppose if the scientists are still using cars to go abroad and attand meetings, the cloning technique will be found many years later, and consequently, a lot of patient have died.
  My second reason is based on the high fees used to protect the traditional culture. Government provide a huge amount of money to rebuild or decorate the old buildings just because they were built by our ancestors, never thinking of their uselessness for accomodation. If the money used to protect these buildings is delivered to the poor, a lot of them will solve the accomodation problem.
  My third reason is that people prefer the modern science and technology with the increasingly improved education system. Twenty-first century has seen a great deal of development in the proportion of people who have taken the high education. They are more willing to use the modern science. For instance, college student always collect their thesis materials by surfing the Internet instead of borrowing books from the libraries.
  All in all, although traditional culture is a heritage from the ancient, it couldn't keep pace with the development of society. The traditional culture and technology have no place in the future and will be eliminated in the end.
  I want to ask what aspects I should improve if I want to get 6.5 in writing?
  修改:
  It is widely noted that some aspects of traditional culture
  has been lost along with the development of modern science. As far as I concerned, the traditional culture and technology will be replaced in this modern erafor several reasons.
  My first reason is that the traditional culture is hindering the development of new science which can improve people's life. Traditional technologies are always considered to be low efficiency. Suppose if the scientists are still using cars to go abroad and attand meetings, the cloning technique will be found many years later, and consequently, a lot of patient have died.
  (this doesn’t make any sense, going abroad by car is nonsense, and it has no relationship to cloning technique, patient’s death is not necessarily as of the result from the delay of commuter.) Recommendation: revise and think of a more persuasive reasoning and logics.
  My second reason is based on the high cost used to protect the traditional culture. Government provides a huge amount of money to rebuild or decorate the old buildings just because they were built by our ancestors; they seldom
  considered their usefulness for accommodation. If the money used to protect these buildings was instead delivered to the poor, a lot of them will solve the accommodation problem.
  My third reason is that people prefer modern science and technology with the increasingly improved education system. Twenty-first centuries has been seenhigh the proportion of people who have taken the higher education. They are more willing to use the modern science. For instance, college student always collect their thesis materials by surfing the Internet instead of borrowing books from the libraries.
  All in all, although traditional culture is a heritage from the ancient, it couldn't keep pace with the development of society. The traditional culture and technology have no place in the future and will be eliminated in the end.
  以上就是传统文化在流失的雅思作文修改的全部介绍,希望对大家有所帮助,最后祝大家都能考出好成绩。

牛人总结的雅思作文评分标准

为大家介绍一位牛人网友在复习IELTS剑桥系列时总结的雅思考试作文评分标准,总结的依据来自该系列中考官的评语,比较科学实用,供广大烤鸭们参考。

雅思考试作文评分标准Grades Standard:

1. The main argument are relevant and the writer's point of view need be clear.

2. The writer's point of view needs many ideas that deal with the actual issues and to be consistent.

3. The prompt could not be copied directly in the response and the words can not less than 250 (at look).

4. There are various range of language in the sentence.

5. The sentence cannot be only simple in all.

6. A range of structure need depend on good control of punctuation and grammar.

ps: Examiner is interested in visual example. if there are some appropriate examples to support your view, your marks will not be low.

雅思考试作文评分标准第一点总是观点问题,一般得4分的都是观点不清晰;第二点提到理由,理由必须要支持观点,理由写的混乱的话,分数肯定不高;第三点是字数问题,一般考官不会数的,差不多就ok了(这是我猜的)但是如果你有多次抄袭题目的原话的话,那他就会不厌其烦的数了,而且抄袭的部分不算,只算剩下的。这三点是大家必须做到的,否则5分都拿不到。

雅思考试作文评分标准第四是语言的组织,也就是连接词用的要恰当,看上去是个小问题,但是这点非常重要,要体现出逻辑表达次序,如果乱用,考官的逻辑思维也会混乱,导致看不懂或不理解你要说什么,不能正常往下阅读,这会让考官非常难受,你想想你让他难受,他会让你好受吗?但是他又不知道你在哪里,就算知道你在哪里也不能把k你一顿阿,就算能k你一顿,也不一定打得过你啊,要知道考官大多都是老头老太,但是这口气一定要出的呀,最后倒霉的还是你的分数(晕,撤远了)

雅思考试作文评分标准第五点句子不能全是简单句,当然简单句看上去容易,也比较容易理解,也不会错,但是在那些老奶奶老爷爷眼里就像是他们在上幼儿园的小孙子小孙女写出来的东西,只是些幼儿园水平的东西(在这里顺便讲件事,大家知道ielts的题目在美国和英联邦国家中是什么等级吗?ielts分听说读写4部分,其中阅读和写作是他们12年级的水平,口语的CueCard部分是他们幼儿园的游戏,他们没有听力,这些时我侄子告诉我的,他在美国,今年刚刚12年级,这次他回来,我给他做了剑桥的题目,他告诉我这些是他们现在这水平做的东西)可想而知,幼儿园水平的东西,分数也只能在幼儿园的水平。

雅思考试作文评分标准第六点就是句子的结构了,这点需要注意的是语法和标点,在我们看来标点并不重要,但是剑桥范文的评语中都有punctuation这词,而且和grammar并列,说明这和语法一样重要,而且也是评分的一个标准,不过,这些都是最后出现的,也就是说相对上面5条来说不怎么重要,在我国英语学习和考试中都是语法为重点,而恰恰人家并不看重它,这让我国许多语法很好的同学,有些英雄无用武之地吧!不过学好语法也不是件坏事。我说不重要只是和上面5条比哦,也别太轻敌哦,毕竟也是评分标准之一,特别在时态的应用上要注意,如果乱用时态让考官进入时间隧道出不来的话,那你就再准备1450把他解救出来吧!

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