让雅思作文“简洁漂亮”的三大建议 雅思作文修改：学生分班问题

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核，综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力，实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说，也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了让雅思作文“简洁漂亮”的三大建议 雅思作文修改：学生分班问题，希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题，敬请关注。

让雅思作文“简洁漂亮”的三大建议

　　中国烤鸭在雅思写作中，极爱用长难句，自己感觉一写长难句就会高大上，但其实不然。本文中新东方雅思网将为大家提出一些让雅思作文“简洁漂亮”的建议，供大家参考。

建议一：避免空洞的单词和词组

1.一些空洞的单词或词组根本不能为句子带来任何相关的或重要的信息，完全可以被删掉。

比如：When all things are considered, young *s of today live more satisfying lives than those of their parents, in my opinion。

这句话当中的“when all things are considered”和“in my opinion“都显得多余。完全可以去掉。改为：

Young *s of today live more satisfying lives than their parents。

2.有些空洞和繁琐的表达方式可以进行替换

例如：Due to the fact that our grandparents were under an obligation to help their parents, they did not have the options that young people have at this point in time。

“due to the fact that”就是一个很典型的繁琐的表达方式的例子，可以替换，简化为下面的表达方式：

Because our grandparents were obligated to help their parents, they did not have the options that young people have now。

建议二：避免重复

1.尽量避免重复使用同样的词汇。或者有的时候虽然词汇没有重复，但意思却有重复。这时候可以做一些简化的工作。

例如下面这个例子：The farm my grandfather grew up on was large in size。

large对一个farm来说就是size方面的large，所以in size可以去掉，改为：

The farm my grandfather grew up on was large。

更简洁的表达方式为：

My grandfather grew up on a large farm。

2.有时一个词组可以用一个更简单的单词来替换

例如：My grandfather has said over and over again that he had to work on his parents' farm。

这里的over and over again就可以改为repeatedly，显得更为简洁：

My grandfather has said repeatedly that he had to work on his parents' farm。

建议三：选择最恰当的语法结构

选择合适的语法结构可以使句子意思的表达更为精确和简练。虽然语法的多样性也很重要，但选择最恰当的语法结构仍然是更为重要的考虑因素。以下原则是在考虑选择何种语法结构时可以参考的原则：

1.一个句子的主语和谓语动词应该能够反映句子中的最重要的意思。

例如：The situation that resulted in my grandfather's not being able to study engineering was that his father needed help on the farm。

从意思上来分析，上面这句话需要表达的重要的概念是“grandfather's not being able to study”，而在表达这个概念时，原句用的主语是situation，谓语动词是was，不能强调需要表达的重点概念，可以改为下面这句话：

My grandfather couldn't study engineering because his father needed help on the farm。

2.避免频繁使用“there be”结构

例如下面的句子：There were 25 cows on the farm that my grandfather had to milk every day. It was hard work for my grandfather。

可以改为：

My grandfather worked hard. He had to milk 25 cows on the farm every day。

更简洁的句式为：

My grandfather worked hard milking 25 cows daily。

3.把从句改为短语或单词。

例如：Dairy cows were raised on the farm, which was located100 kilometers from the nearest university and was in an area that was remote。

简介的表达方式为：

The dairy farm was located in a remote area, 100 kilometers to the nearest university。

4.仅在需要强调宾语而不是主语的时候，才使用被动语态。

例如：In the fall, not only did the cows have to be milked, but also the hay was mowed and stacked by my grandfather's family。

本句不够简洁的原因是本句的重心应该是“忙碌的家庭-my grandfather's family”，而使用了被动语态後，彷佛重心变成了cows和hay。下面的表达方式是主动语态，相对来说更简洁一些：

In the fall, my grandfather's family not only milked the cow but also mowed and stacked the hay。

5.用更为精确的一个动词来代替动词短语，

例如：My grandfather didn't have time to stand around doing nothing with his school friends。

Stand around doing nothing其实可以用一个动词来表达，即loiter：

My grandfather didn't have time to loiter with his school friends。

6.有时两句话的信息经过组合完全可以用一句话来简练地表达

例如：Profits from the farm were not large. Sometimes they were too *all to meet the expenses of running a farm. They were not sufficient to pay for a university degree。

两句话的信息可以合并为下面这句更为简洁的句子：

Profits from the farm were sometimes too *all to meet operational expenses, let alone pay for a university degree。

雅思作文修改：学生分班问题

The notions of tracking and ability grouping have been contentious topics since the 1970s. Should students be grouped according to their academic ability?

There is much discussion these days about the notions of tracking and ability grouping since the 1970s. Some people believe that it is damaging to students’ development, while others harbor the opinion that it is beneficial for them. From my point of view, I am definitely in agreement with the latter opinion.

In the first instance, it is easier for teachers to teach according to their academic ability. Teachers should not worry about the students who get lower grades will not understand what they said（teach） during the class anymore. If teachers spend more time explaining for the students with lower ability, it is a waste of time for the students who has understood. It is unfair.

Secondly, it is the best way to study together for the students with the same level. They can discuss, exchange their ideas and deal with problems together. However, if now there are some students with lower levels among them, the students may be too shy to express their views, for they are afraid of being laughed at. Perhaps, those students would become more and more introverted resulting from this. Furthermore, the competition between students with higher levels is so fierce that they should try all the way out to keep their positions in the class, imaging it, can the rest students adapt to this situation? I think it is likely to have an unfavorable influence on their confidence.

Even though some people think it is rather bad to distinct the students, if students can benefit from this, I strongly suggest that we can take it into account.

All in all, in my opinion, I am in high favor that students should be grouped according to their ability because this can help students develop better in the future.

这篇文章整体结构很清晰，各部分处理的也不错

缺点在于：

第一，两段立论段落论述的比较单薄

你分成了两段，对学生，对老师

如果让我给你建议，我会这样分段：

1. 对学生学习方面的影响

2. 对学生心理层面的影响

这样可能会更有深度

第二，开头段的直接引入太简单了，改为大范围会好一点，这是我们上课讲的一个重点

With the rapid social development, there are many arguments about education, among which the notions of tracking and ability grouping since the 1970s could be one of the most remarkable one. Quite a few people believe that it is damaging to students’ development, but in practice, i hold the opinion that it is beneficial for them.

如果我来打分的话：band 5/5.5

以上就是雅思无忧网为您准备的访问雅思无忧网(https://www.yasi.cn/)，了解更多雅思考试新消息，新动态。

雅思培训
免责声明：文章内容来自网络，如有侵权请及时联系删除。