当前位置:雅思无忧 > 雅思写作 > 正文

雅思作文主体段写作技巧 Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1)

更新:2023年05月03日 13:18 雅思无忧

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核,综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力,实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说,也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了雅思作文主体段写作技巧 Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1),希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题,敬请关注。
雅思作文主体段写作技巧 Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1)

雅思作文主体段写作技巧

 雅思作文主体段写作技巧。主体段落一般由主题句和扩展句构成。主题句一般放在第一句,是段落核心,用来概括全段内容。主题句分为笼统主题句和具体主题句。笼统主体句的作用是引出下文,点明方向,具体主题句则概况下面内容的核心主题。仅有主题观点是不够的,还要对其进行论证,也就是围绕主题进行论证,对其进行说明、叙述、举例及论述。
  一、举实例论证。
  有些考生在开头提出观点之后,就不知道该如何继续下去。这种情况下,考生可以举实例论证,举例是我们解释论证一个观点最好的方式,也是最有说服力的。
  Although sticking to one’s goal is key to success, sometimes one should be ready to give up. Napoleon’s story is a case in point. After Napoleon succeeded in seizing the crown of France, he should have been satisfied with his achievement. But he did not. He went on to conquer the whole Europe. Then after he succeeded in ruling almost the whole Europe, he should have given up this ambition to expanding his empire. But he did not. He went on to invade Russia and there he suffered a total defeat. Later he was sent into exile and died in a lonely island.
  本段引用了拿破仑的事迹来加以论证。拿破仑是家喻户晓的人物,而且最后决定拿破仑及其帝国命运的滑铁卢战役也是大家都知晓的。通过这个例子来说明在适当的时候学会放弃是很有说服力的。在举例时,最好选择一些大家都知晓的,这样才能更有说服力。当然考生也可以用自己的亲身经历来加以论证。
  The second reason for my propensity for outdoor activities is that they can build my mind greatly. In sports, one must learn to struggle for the victory, learn to fight with no matter what is left in his body. And one must learn to stick to one’s own confidence and hope, no matter how little the hope may be. And one must learn to accept failure, learn to start again after failure. Long-running and mountain climbing contribute much to this kind of spirits. I will never forget the feeling when I raced to the final line first in a 300-meter running. I could hardly breathe in the last 100 meters. My lungs ached and my legs weighed tons, but there was still one runner in front of me. I gave all my strength to move one foot ahead of the other. When I surpassed him, he gave a cry of surprise, I won at last and I learned much from the race.
  文章在提出主题句后,先是加以论述,然后用长跑和爬山作为例子。最后又用自己的亲身经历和感受来论证室外活动可以增强一个人的毅力。
  二、用一些研究、调查、发现、科学家及权威人士的观点或组织机构的研究结果加以论证,并引用数据作为支撑。此论证方法的好处就是比较权威客观,更有说服力。

Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1)

题目:Some people believe the fittest and strongest individual and team achieve the great success in the sports. Others believe success depends on their mental attitudes. Discuss on both sides. What is your opinion?

Sports, no matter what their scales are, are the combination of intelligent and psychological factors and physical power of team members. To pursue success in sports, these factors are all indispensable and interactive.
(Comments: 1.(Don’t repeat your mistakes!))

Some people may argue that the only determinant for winning a sport is the physical strength of the team members. Namely, the stronger the individuals are, the higher possibilities the team will succeed in a competition event. We have to admit that the majority of sports require team members to have fit and powerful bodies. However, we should also notice that competition with other teams is not fighting with them. It is hard to image that a group of strongest apes win a game against a team of higher intelligent creatures.

( Comments: 2.(Pay close heed to the fact that you should use the noun form to function as the subject !) (Object clause is a good choice, and the non-predicate structure is also acceptable, yet never confuse them!))

Intelligent and psychological factors, therefore, play another part of important role in sports. Provided that a team is equipped with the strongest team members, it is still less likely for them to succeed in one game if its members are pessimistic and lack of strategies in competing with other teams. One famous case which can illustrate the importance of mental attitude and intelligent factors is that the Chinese football team’s successful entrance in the World Cup. The motto of that team’s coach is that attitude determinates everything. With the guidance of their coach, Chinese football players finally won the entrance competition with the support of positive attitude and appropriate strategies.

(Comments: 3. (Excellent! Very good application of exemplification!)

(The original slogan of the Chinese football team is “Attitude is everything!”) What you used here may seem a little Chinglish.)

Intelligent and mental power and the physical strength of team members are mutually influencing one another. The advantage of physical condition may probably add confidence to team members and inspire their best psychological state. On the other hand, the optimistic and positive attitudes are most likely to stimulate the best potential of individuals and bring them encouragement and ultimately lead to success. It can therefore be arguably concluded that mental attitude and physical condition are both significant in pursuing a team’s victory.

Very excellent as a whole!

Just keep up the good work and do the same in IELTS exam!

Pay close attention to details!

Grades: 7

以上就是雅思无忧网为您准备的访问雅思无忧网(https://www.yasi.cn/),了解更多雅思考试新消息,新动态。

雅思培训
免责声明:文章内容来自网络,如有侵权请及时联系删除。
推荐阅读
标签 - 专题
  鲁ICP备18049789号-14

2022雅思无忧网版权所有 All right reserved. 版权所有

警告:未经本网授权不得转载、摘编或利用其它方式使用上述作品