雅思作文修改：网络代替学校 4月3日雅思作文范文

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核，综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力，实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说，也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了雅思作文修改：网络代替学校 4月3日雅思作文范文，希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题，敬请关注。

雅思作文修改：网络代替学校

很多同学发来四段式的作文给我，但是真正能写好四段式的没有几个，下面这篇的错误比较典型，给大家参考。

题目如下：schools are no longer necessary, because children can get so much information available through Internet, and they can study just as well at home.What extent do you agree or disagree?

Scientific developments have brought us many benefits, among which the internet must be the most spectacular one. In the near future, it might take the place of schools so that it is convenient for children to obtain knowledge.

我很高兴地看到你可以把上课时讲的很多句子和单词应用在这篇四段式文章中，但是我划横线的句子表现出了你一定的倾向性，你可以把这句改为（there has long been a discussion about the opinion that whether the internet could take the place of schools.）这样可以做到客观的引入话题，而不表明观点。

With time going by, Internet has become an encyclopedia in some degree. It seems that there are an increasing number of children are fund of getting information from the Internet. Some of them are in a great need of gaining information while others just surf it as a hobby. As is known to all that encyclopedia is large enough to satisfy those little children and of course the knowledge in textbooks is included. In that case, there is no need to employ teachers to teach children. As a result children can study just as well at home and get a good grade.

However, there are certainly demerits in studying at home with the Internet. People who make the webpages can make mistakes and some knowledge is completely wrong. As a child, it is not an easy job to distinguish the information. Unlike at home, children are able to obtain knowledge in a systematic way. Besides, children who study at home are more withdrawn than those who study at schools. What is more, children don’t require teachers and that means people who now are teachers will lose their jobs. It may cause the dissipation of human resources and their families are in great trouble of making a living.

上面一段有两个问题：

1.负面的问题我觉得分析的不够，错误应该只是一个小的方面，更重要的应该是：没有人引导，孩子的学习效率会比较低下。

2.我读了划横线的句子后，感觉你的观点应该是支持网络替代学校，因为你用了，certainly这个让步词，但是你在下面一段却表明了跟我的猜测相反的观点，前后不一致，这个是致命的错误。

My view is that schools are still necessary in the future. That is the best way for children to not only get their knowledge in a systematic way but also develop their interpersonal skills. Internet is, in the long run , just a tool to widen their horizons.

如果我打分的话，Band 5

4月3日雅思作文范文

发贴：北语雅思

这是个很古老的题目的翻版。1999年有过这样一个题目：

Contrary to people's belief, international touri* does not promote understanding between people from different cultures. To what extent do you agree?

范文：

Every year, hundreds of millions of people move around to see a different part of the world. It is natural to assume that tourists who have seen other countries have a better knowledge of the people. That assumption also leads to the conclusion that international touri* promotes understanding between nations. How true is this? Let us examine what tourists do in a different country.
First, before going abroad, tourists are often told by their travel agents of the possible hazards which sometimes include local people. They are given example of extreme cases where victims are always the travelers. Then, when they arrive, they are immediately taken to their hotels in big coaches. They flood places where local people don't go. Their shopping, meals, entertainment all take place in secluded areas. They wear a bubble all the way. Apart from speaking to the guide and a few shop assistants, tourists rarely talk to the local people. To make it even worse, they meet pickpockets, they are ripped off by dishonest traders. Furthermore, very few local people bother to talk to them out of a genuine interest in the guests' country, people and culture. Therefore, when asked how much they know about the local people, their answer is "very little".
If someone really wants to understand a different culture, he has to learn its language, stay there for at least a few month without wearing a bubble, learn how to curse and swear, bargain with a vegetable vendor and then he can say that he understands the people.（258 words）
简评：
这是一个已在西方得到广泛讨论的题目，普遍被接受的答案是旅游起不到促进民族、文化之间的交流与理解。
不同文化所推崇的东西也不同，这里有一个political correctness的问题。
要注意西方的时尚，如裘皮大衣、红木家具就不为青年人所推崇，参加旅游团也是退休的老头、老太太们的事。我们所追求的内容，如私人轿车、(旅行团式的)出国旅游在一些西方人看来有点“傻”。一些雅思考官就是这样的人。他们理应只评判我们的语言，但内容上能与他们的思想合拍岂不更好？
注意第二段中 first, then, to make it even worse, furthermore 的用法。

摘自《IELTS应试指南》，北京语言大学出版社，2000年10月出版，作者：陈卫东

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